Operation: Christmas Card Slacker

Yea, thats me! Today is December 1st and I still haven't taken the kids pictures for our cards. I could say that its because I don't have Brayden's sweater, but a look in my kids closets and they have other uber cute things to wear. I just dread designing the card. Point. Blank. Simple. BUT! This year, I'm relying on the designers at Shutterfly! All I have to do is photograph a two year old and a three year old. Easy Peasy...NOT!

Had I even thought about it last year, I would have gone through their Christmas Photo cards and picked instead of driving myself crazy with a design. Woulda Shoulda Coulda.

Another one of those oops moments was the birth of Aslynn. Poor girl got jipped. She didn't get a birth announcementlike Brayden did. BUT!! Shutterfly does those too just incase I ever needed another one!

And another thing that I may just honestly have to hit up Shutterfly for is their thank you cards because, I don't know about you, but I detest picking them out and writing them and blah blah blah.

So! if you are a fellow blogger like me, hop on over to Shutterfly to see how you can get 50 of their Christmas Cards free!

And if you don't mind, I have a card design to pick out!

Could it be???

I very much think it could be! I completed a crochet project! Actually, I completed 3 while Momma was here. But, alas, they weren't any that I had started prior to her arrival.

I still did it though, d@mnit!

I made her a washcloth, and well following the pattern, it turned out a little larger than your typical washcloth. But it is ooh so soft. As far as the size, lets just say that for a while it was used as a blanket by my tea-cup chihuahua.



I also made her two little, random motifs. She wanted a flower, so I made her a little flower out of Sugar n' Cream cotton and I also made her some other pretty as well.





I'm thinking of trying Tunisian Crochet...because we all know that I have failed now multiple times trying to knit. D@mn needles are too long and get in my way. I may have to make my own needles...CRAFT PROJECT!

Splish, Splash, Two Toddlers in the Bath

And yes, that is shaving cream. I love those two!

My life is.....

a sweet little boy with so much love to give



and

a little princess who knows she rules the world at 2



That is my life. Throughout the drama, the anger, the pain, everything, they are what matter. I look at them and instantly my day gets better. I know what they mean when they talk about giving your life in order to let them keep theirs. I would do anything for these two.

I got 99 problems and my weight is one......

I used to think in high school that I was fat. Compared to my friends who were size 0's and 2's, yeah, my size 14 self was bigger than they were. I'd love to go back in time and smack the past me in the head. I look back at pictures and realize that I wasn't that bad. It was just because I wasn't as small as they were. I still could wear American Eagle and Aeropostle. And oh how did I have a love affair with AE's petite flared jeans. It's like they were made just for me. They were the perfect length for my little 5 foot self.

Fast forward through the freshman god only knows how many, two children and postpartum depression.

I no longer am the size 14 that I hated, which now love. I'll put it out there. I'm a 20. Gah. I got an ass that would rival most. And not in a good way.

I'm starting small....cutting back on what I eat, I gave up 95% my love affair with coke and started drinking more water. I've added in a protein shake here and there. Baby steps.

My initial goal is 25 lbs. When I get brave enough to step on the scale, I'll let you know because it's all about being accountable. I need to do this.

I have found a new love for my drinks. Ocean Spray makes the little water packets in Blueberry Lemonade and Blueberry Pomegranate. Swoon. The second is just to die for. I'm still finding my love for the lemonade, but only because I never have been a lemonade person.

25lbs.

I can do it. Now, who wants to get me a gym membership or Zumba????

Invisible monthly friend??

So, shortly after I popped out Aslynn, I knew something had to be done because two babies in two years was more than what my uterus wanted. Me and my uterus, we have this connection, that's how we roll. After consulting my family oracle, aka my sister, we decided that an IUD would be my best bet because obviously that fabulous little pill didn't want to be my friend.

So, me and her trek into my OB's office on that fateful day. Monica could honestly tell you how many times my eyes rolled back into my head as Dr. Aguayo either pulled out some cervical clamps or even so much as played with the IUD insertion wand.

So...fast forward. I spotted for a while and then what once plagued me every damn month like clockwork was gone. No, I am by no means crazy enough to complain.

But I'll be damned if mother nature doesn't like to play games. She is a sneaky little b*tch if I do say so myself. No, I may not bleed every month but lord, if I don't get pissy and break out still. Damnit, I want my cake and to be able to eat it to, but again obviously that is mother nature's way of telling me my ass is too big.

Now, yes, my significant other is a lazy bastard but out of nowhere today, after coming home from the grocery store, I get pissy. WTF and where did that come from. I no longer wanted to cook, yet alone look at my kitchen or any room for that matter. I just wanted to leave out the back door and vanish. I was pissed. I was spiteful through every fork that I washed or any other chore that I did.

And in looking at the calendar I notice that yes, had I still bled to death every month, it would be starting roughly in the next few days.

But in all other words....I.Love.My.Mirena!

Fictional Reality

That's the perfect oxymoron right there.

When I was little, I dreamed of what life would be like when I was older. I'd be happily married with kids and wouldn't have to worry about pretty much anything.

BAH!

What the hell was I thinking??????

Seriously though, if I could go back in time, I would smack the younger me upside the head and drill some sense into me.

Now though before I go any further, I love my children and I wouldn't change having them for anything in the world. I don't regret them.

Life doesn't go according to plan. Aren't we always told that? Well, shit no, obviously it doesn't. Because if it did. I would have a fat Nuclear Engineering Degree from UT-Knoxville hopefully working somewhere making a career.

Instead, the only perfect thing in my life are my two children. I spend my days teaching and learning from them or deep in my crafts. Children and crafts...hmm...that wasn't part of my original plan either.

Damn.

I've made a promise to myself that this roller coaster ride is about to end. My emotions can't take anymore and I can't pretend to be happy. It's actually starting to hurt.

I don't like change. AT.ALL. I need this change or else I don't know what will happen.

Fictional Reality. If only..right?

Holy Jesus, I'm alive

I know you missed me. My loyal, what, 3 readers or so? And really, I have 2 that I talk with on a near constant basis, and I just spent a month with one of them so really, 1 loyal reader who is out of the loop.

To give you a brief update on my life since my last post

• We had the kids joint birthday party. My aunt and uncle who live in Myrtle Beach came. Asshat and stepwitch didn't. Surprise, surprise. That's another post for another day. Trust.Me. The kids were loaded up with toys and clothes galore. They had the best present ever of having their Grammy there to see it all.
• 90% of the world learned, that already didn't know, that I am unhappy in my situation. Again, another post, another day. I'll keep you wondering for now.
• Stating the obvious, I have the most precious children on the planet, and without them, I would be lost.
• And this one actually happened prior to my last post, but it was still a little on the down low. I became an aunt to an angel. My lovely sister, after 4 years of trying, conceived, only to have discovered butterbean nesting nicely in her tube. It's a grieving process for her and I try to be there when she wants me. And no matter what others say, she became a mother and I an aunt.
  
• I'm currently blogging with the giggles of two supposed to be in bed children as my background noise. I.Freaking.Love.Those.Kids.
• I've laughed. I've cried. I've slept. I've not slept. I've crafted.
• I've been a mom to two children in diapers. Potty training is a slow process.

Happy Birthday Aslynn Grace

Dear, sweet, Aslynn Grace, where do I begin. Ever since I was pregnant with you, you have definitely shown that you are a princess and demand attention. I shed many tears over you while you were growing inside of me. First there was the excessive bleeding, which caused me to think I was losing you. That turned out to be a bigger scare for me, Placenta Previa. At that point in time, I dreamed of nothing but having another wonderful vaginal birth, which it seemed I wouldn't get this time. I was put on modified bed rest to make sure that you stayed put and safe. Monthly visits turned into high-risk bi-weekly visits to monitor the movement of the placenta if any. Your Aunt MiMi tried to convince me that it was alright to have a c-section, bless her.

Here is where you decided that you wanted to be stubborn and not let Dr. Aguayo see everything she needed to see to make sure you were developing properly. That led to a frantic call to MiMi and a trip to the Center for Imaging Excellence to see what the Radiologist could see. That hour, sweet girl, should have been enough to send me into labor right then. I remember how the Radiologist and the tech were oh so quiet and just stared at the screen as they scanned. It would be days before I knew anything, even if you were alright. You just wanted attention. You were just as healthy as you needed to be. It was observed that my previa was worse that they thought but we would just play it as it came.

You grew and grew, and boy did my belly show how you were growing. Countless trips to L&D for countless, serious false alarms were made but because I still had the previa, no contraction could be ignored. At this time, I had convinced myself that as long as you were healthy, I didn't care how you came into this world. I think you heard me and took that to heart.

Your brother's first birthday came and went, and thankfully, I was still pregnant with you. The question though was would you make it until your due date of July 4th. I knew I didn't want a holiday baby, but it was up to you. On the night of your brother's birthday, I broke my toe, and not just any toe, but my pinky toe and it just so happened to be the bone in the foot. Fabulous. By now, we were 98% sure that the previa had cleared, so I was given the go ahead for another vaginal birth with the disclaimer that if I started to bleed or anything showed you in distress then I would be whisked off to the OR.

I knew from word of mouth and such that the 2nd time goes a lot quicker. I took that to heart but I had no idea. The morning of the 23rd I started having serious contractions. They were unlike the ones I had experienced with your brother at that. I decided that it was time to go in. We got to the hospital around 6am. We got checked in and I was changed and confined to the bed. Oh dear girl, you were an interesting labor. You refused to allow us to keep a monitor on you, but we needed to because your heart was scaring us to death. Dr. Aguayo came in roughly around 7 and I was 4 and 50%. My water had already somewhat broken so she finished it off and we got an internal monitor on you. You didn't like that one bit. By 8 my contractions were completely unbearable. I needed that epidural. You had other plans. Between 8:45 and 11:59, I had had 4 epidurals, none of which were working and you weren't making labor any easier. Your poor father had never seen me like that. There was no channeling my thoughts to get through the contractions. Their were fierce and painful.

On the last attempt at an epidural words were spoken of a spinal. I was game for anything at this point. The Anesthesiologist and the nurse spoke, the nurse was okay with it because currently I was 7 and 100%. I had time she said. I had time for the Dr. to get there. Famous.Last.Words. No sooner than I was told I would be getting the spinal, I stopped her mid-sentence and "I think I have to push". "No you don't, you just think you have to." "No, I've done this before, and I feel pressure, I HAVE TO PUSH." I think at that point as the nurse was flying to check me she may have said " Oh Shit"

So needless to say, I went from 7 to 10 in a matter of seconds. You wanted to make your arrival something. You succeeded little girl. Although Dr. Aguayo's office was just behind the hospital, she didn't have time. You came out into the world like a rocket, only after 3 pushes, into the hands of the nurse with the Anesthesiologist serving as the nurse at 11:59. We won't even remind you of the fact that I still had this broken bone in my foot which I had to push against your fathers hand which. Yea, that hurt. So, sweet girl, lets recap the days events. Fast labor-roughly 6 hours, completely natural-that was an experience, broken foot bone and pushing and being delivered with no OB in site. Dr. Aguayo won the bet of when you would show up. She said before lunch, and well it was before lunch.

You weighed a dainty 6lbs 7oz and was 21 inches long. You had a head full of dark brown hair and dark blue eyes. You were so tiny. You still are to this day. Dainty. Although I think you might just pass your brother in height over the next year.

You no longer have brown hair, but your eyes are still as blue as the day you were born. You've been a princess since the day you were conceived and I don't foresee that changing anytime soon. You love having your nails painted and your hair done and love wearing pretties.

I love you, Aslynn Grace, more than you will ever imagine. You and I share a connection that your brother will never understand.

To the sweetest boy in the world

Today, 3 years ago at 3:59 pm, I had the pleasure of becoming a mother. I gave birth to a beautiful little boy who weighed in at 7lbs 11oz and was 21 inches long. Little did I know that during the course of these next three years he would have the ability to steal my heart over and over, time and time again. Over these past three years we have overcome many obstacles with him, some more heartbreaking than others, but I wouldn't have it any other

way. Little did we know that over this course, at just a fragile age of a year and a half, you would be attacked by a dog to the face and require your first major surgery. Little did we know that just after you turned 2 would we start speech therapy because you wouldn't talk. Little did we know that just a year later after the attack you would be diagnosed with a conductive hearing loss bilaterally that could be fixed by surgery for tubes. You, Brayden, since then have blossomed into the sweetest, most loving little boy who knows who his family is and isn't afraid to show them love. You try and speak non-stop now and are just a heartbreaker. You will start pre-school in the fall and I just don't know what to do. You are growing up entirely way to fast for me. I will never forget the feeling I had the first moment I looked into your beautiful blue eyes that June afternoon. I knew then that I was in love. Granted you were a "stinky boy" and not the little girl I was told I was having, I wouldn't change it. I may have cried to no end on the day I found that out but I love you more than I ever thought I could.

I want nothing but the best in life for you, Brayden. I want you to grow up smart and strong and with a fierce determination to succeed in life. I want you to want to take life by the horns and show it who is boss.

I love you Brayden Victor, more than you will ever understand!

Wordless Wednesday

*a preview

10 on Tuesday

We took our first family vacay the first weekend on March. We went to Gatlinburg/Knoxville for my old college buddy Jon's birthday. We arrived on Sunday and left that following Tuesday. It was just long enough. We took the kids to the Ripley's Aquarium up there and they just loved seeing all of the fish. Like a goob, I left my memory card OUT of the camera and didn't realize it until we got out tickets and what not. Thankfully and not so much the gift shop had one. Granted I really hated paying $31 for a 2gb memory card but it was worth it.

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3. I've slowly started working on the kids birthday's. I've gotten a date picked out and some other smaller things worked out. I really can't believe that they are going to be 3 and 2! It makes me sad at how fast time has flown.
4. Yesterday marked the 1 year anniversary of Brayden's dog attack. I'm thankful every day that I have my little boy to love on and smother with kisses. His scars have healed up nicely and those on his head have given him the wonky-est cowlick ever. It's a pain to cut but just minor than what it could be.
5. I have everything needed for the kids for Easter. Which is a major plus for me! Brayden's outfit should be here tomorrow and Aslynn's is hanging up waiting. Hopefully it will be nice this year and I'll be able to take some good pictures of them.
6. I've been crocheting odds and ends of things as well as their blankets. I've got a bunch of dishcloths and hot pads waiting for me to sew the ends in and give them to their respective owners.
   
7. I can only really think of 6 so the rest will be pictures. :D
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1. This was a road sign in Sevierville where they are currently doing road construction.

Obstacles

Many of you know that we have been working over the past 6 months with Brayden and speech therapy. We also for the past 6 months have had an audiology appointment for him. That was Feb 16th and needless to say we didn't get confirmed answers. We just got more theories. The audiologist pretty much said that Brayden has conductive hearing loss in both ears. But what she couldn't answer was how come or why. She guessed that Brayden, from the looks of his ears had a double ear infection, which he may have had, but that doesn't change anything because his hearing has been the same regardless of one, two or no infections. Currently Brayden has to hear things at 25% higher of decibel volume. She said we should treat the infections if there are, she actually stated something different that has escaped me and we could have it retested in 2 months to make sure the infection is indeed gone or we could seek the opinion of an ENT.

So, devestated none the less, I called his Ped. to get a referral for an ENT. Well she called back and said that she would like to check Brayden over just to make sure but the soonest appointment was a week out. No biggie, I didn't care because Brayden tells us when his ears hurt and he had been the same Brayden and never did his normal ear infection clues, so I didn't believe he had one or two even.

Our main reason for seeking the opinion of the ENT is to see what he/she thinks would be our best option. If tubes are that route, so be it. If tubes aren't then I want answer and help on how to allow my child to hear and speak to me.

We currently are waiting to hear from the ENT's office about an appointment.

I just need answers because right now is the time for Brayden to learn so much. Speech Therapy isn't doing him any good...out of the past 2 months the only thing he has gotten out of it is the sign for more and he really doesn't do that. What.the.f*ck.

It doesn't help, and I know she can't help it bless her heart, that Aslynn is little Miss Chatterbox with her Momma, thank you, love you, cup, please, bye, hi, night night, nummy, granna, mimi, ect.

I've wished for answers for so long and now I'm starting to think that there are no answers except that he can't hear all that well. If that is the answer then so be it I just want to know for sure, 100% for sure.

Catching up

Honestly the only excuse I have for being MIA in the blogospehere is that I have been submerged in Brayden's blanket. Yes, I said Brayden's. Aslynn's well, for right now is sitting in two piles, waiting for more pieces to be completed and for the completed ones to be blocked.

Brayden's has given me more of a challenge and I love it. I actually checked out from the library Jan Eaton's book 200 Crochet Blocks. I love love love this book, and I checked it out because I couldn't find it anywhere except online. Well, now I have found it at Michael's but I am going to wait to buy it, because this book is a must have!

When I get my pictures on my laptop, I'll post current pictures of both blankets.

And yes, I said laptop. We broke down and bought two new HP laptops, 1) since are desktop was on its last leg anyway and 2) because with Brad leaving soon to go to school to get his CDL its a form of communication for the both of us.

Most of my time though lately has been either cleaning and taking care of the kiddos or crocheting. I actually even took a break from both blankets and starting working on other things. :D I won't divulge just yet since part of what I am working on is for both my mom and Monica. Nothing too big, just an aching to work with another type of yarn and to test my skills. BTW, I absolutely love working with Cotton yarn. LOVE IT!!

I did get a new book for Valentine's day. It's called Beyond-the-Square Crochet Motifs by Edie Eckman. I am loving that book and cannot wait to get my hook going on some of those patterns.

I will, though post pictures when I am done and they have gotten theirs.

I'm starting to think that Hell has frozen too. I live in Alabama. And I will be damned if before this past year I could count on all my fingers and toes how many times it has snowed since I was a wee one. Now, 2010 is a different story. In just the past 2 months, it has snowed 5 times. That isn't normal here. People run out and clean the stores of milk,eggs and bread. WTF are they going to live off of French Toast if they get snowed in?? I'm not complaining, I love the snow, I honestly wish it would snow like it does back in Michigan.


Other than that not much. Brayden has his hearing tested tomorrow, the 16th, to see if he needs tubes and if that is indeed is what is causing his delay in speech. We have his meeting with the school system on March 3rd for Pre-school for the Head Start program. And we will start his transistion from his at home services to the pre-school program and in the fall he will start Pre-school!

Aslynn is Aslynn. We've given her paci's for naptime and bed because her two fingers that she sucks on could use a break. She sucks on the so much that they are cracked and everything. She picked out her own pacis and doesn't mind them one bit.

Aslynn's blanket

Her blanket is coming along rather nicely if I do say so myself :D I have 16 hexagons finished as of right now. With the rate I am going, it will be done before her birthday so I decided that I will make Brayden a different blanket for his birthday as well. Here are pictures of the first 5 hexagons that I made. They are all some sort of color pattern using the same 5 colors.

A close-up of one of the hexagons. The yarn I got at Hobby Lobby and is called something like " I love this yarn!" It it super soft and I love it.

A picture of the first 5 that I did.

I'm rather proud of myself, I'm now able to produce the rounds rather quickly and am getting better and it as time goes on.

Wordless Wednesday

Granny-ing along

Make any sense?

I'm crocheting. Again. After a 5 year hiatus. The first time was a horrible attempt and looked nothing like what I wanted. And it was just a scarf. I had previously fed my scarf addiction by knitting with a loom, which I loved and could quickly spit out a scarf in no time flat. Aslynn and I both have quite a few, lol.


So I got a wild hair and decided to trying and figure out what I was doing wrong. Well, long story short, I figured it out and even mastered a few other things to become rather proud of myself.


So, you may ask what is this granny-ing along....Granny Squares. Fell in love with them at first glance. They can be colorful! Which if you know me that is just well ME! And they can be any size, shape, pattern. They don't have to be square. They can have flowers in the middle, ect. The possibilities are endless.





So I have taken it upon myself, to spend my time, I guess, making Aslynn a Granny square blanket. I have chosen white, peacock blue, pink, lime green and purple. I wil be posting pictures and blogging as I go along, so that you can see my progress as well. I decided that I wouldn't make her a traditional square blanket. I am going to make her a blanket using a 6-sided granny square at which I found the pattern that Crochet Mania. She also has tutorials of each of her patterns on youtube, which has helped my out rather immensly.

Food for thought

Cooking

It's a seven letter word that I love. I love to cook. I love to bake. I love to try new things. I LOVE LOVE LOVE cookbooks. It's almost become a problem my love of cookbooks. I have some that are older than dirt that belonged to my Grandmother. I have some ones that I just really won't cook anything out of. I have one that moved with me from Dads house that I always claimed as MINE. I cooked things for the family out of it as a trial and error in cooking. They didn't always rock but they were good sports and told me other-wise.

I love to bake and honestly that I think comes from my Grandma J. She was a baker. I would love to get my hands on her baking recipes. That will be a great day. Just to look through them and copy the ones that I remember as a child.

Last year I stumbled upon what is now one of my favorite websites. The Pioneer Woman. End of Story, hooked. I spent countless hours deep in her website. Many of those spent drooling over the dishes she cooked and blogged about. Then, but what could have made my world better, was her announcing a cookbook! WHAT?! How did she know that that was what I dreamed of.

It was released and I waited patiently to purchase it. Until my sister, Monica, promised me that very book for Christmas. JACKPOT!!!

I have now read it cover to cover and even tried a few of the mouth-watering recipes that call my name such as the Marlboro Man Sandwhich and her Potato Skins.

I think I may have a problem... :D

Wordless Wednesday

Our Christmas

Christmas around here is usually a packed day or two. On Christmas Eve we go to Brad's parents for a steak dinner and to open presents. Then on Christmas morning we wake up and do our Christmas, play for a while and then get ready to eat brunch at Brad's Aunt's house. We usually spend a few hours there before we pack up to spend the evening with my Aunt and Uncle and MiMi and Craig. The kids always have fun and usually crash on the way home.

Aslynn with one of her many babies she got for Christmas

Brayden finally got into unwrapping the presents.

Aslynn opening her Cabbage Patch baby from Grandma!

Brayden with MiMi opening his Tag Jr. books.

Aslynn playing with her Tea-pot from MiMi and Craig.